Wednesday, February 8, 2006

Hostel

Written by:
Eli Roth

Directed by:
Eli Roth

Made in:
USA in 2005

Actors:
Jay Hernandez .... Paxton
Derek Richardson .... Josh
Eythor Gudjonsson .... Oli
Barbara Nedeljakova .... Natalya
Jan Vlasák .... The Dutch Businessman
Jana Kaderabkova .... Svetlana
Jennifer Lim .... Kana
Lubomir Bukovy .... Alex
Jana Havlickova .... Vala
Rick Hoffman .... The American Client
Petr Janis .... The German Surgeon
Takashi Miike .... Miike Takashi
Patrik Zigo .... Bubble Gum Gang Leader
Milda Jedi Havlas .... Desk Clerk Jedi
Martin Kubacák .... The Scarred Cab Driver

Plot:
3 backpackers are in Amsterdam where they get locked out of their youth hostel. they are invited into a mans house where he tells them of a hostel somewhere in eastern Europe where the women are all incredibly hot and have a taste for American men. when they get there everything is so to good to be true the hostel is "to die for" IMDB

Review:
What a horrible, awful movie. Personally, I think it was a piece of junk.

I have a big opinion about this movie, only because it... it could have been an awesome movie, but it.. it is worth absolutely nothing. The 20 minutes taht the movie actually has a plot isn't enough to carry the rest of the movie.

The beginning starts out like any other bad teen movie. Typical American males in movies giving bad influence to real American males.
And one thing that really bothered me.. the first thing I said to myself, "There is no way their cell phones would work in Eastern Europe......." Something that obvious needs some kind of an explanation...

Most of the movie is about the annoying males trying to get laid ... and that consumes every part of the movie. I can accept this part of the plot, but the attitude of the males was what distrubed me the most. Like these 30+ year old actors trying to be guys in their early 20's would be looking at bare chested women and acting as if they've never seen boobs before... much less be fluent in German.

After about 5 minutes into the movie, I knew it was going to be a typical let's-try-to-show-as-many-naked-females-as-possible movie.

Only about two-thirds of the way into the movie do they get into the main plot. And I'm sorry to say that the gory, nasty parts of the movie were really, really good. Which makes me mad, because the rest of the movie should have been just as good.

I do not recommend this movie. Only if you wanna see something cheesy like American Pie. I really hope that some European director remakes the movie and makes it the way it should have been.
Like some Swedish men in their 50's going to Thailand and get sucked into the same dilemma ... that would be much, much more believable.

I almost tried to pull a SouthPark when the boys tried to get their money back from Mel Gibson after seeing The Passion of the Christ.

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